June's Lies
by Ladii Emelia
Summary: Draco struggles with a problem, and Hermione is there to help him. Disclaimer: I don't own what JK created.


_A/N: Not my normal lemon, but there's one in here. I was in an angst-y mood when I wrote this, plus I had Rain by Sid playing. I don't own the song, but I did use some of the lyrics in this. **Not** a songfic though. Anyway, hope you enjoy._

**June's Lies**

June 5. Another birthday. Really just another day.

I stand in front of my window looking out at the rainy streets below. She'll be coming soon, coming back to me for a short time before returning to her perfect world while I remain here in this hell. It's always the same, but does anything ever really change?

The mundane scene before me causes me to drift into my memories and takes me away from the lies I keep telling myself. I know everything already, but I keep trying to convince myself otherwise. My hope is that the memories will fade, or perhaps I'll only remember the lies I've been holding onto.

My doorbell rings and brings me back to the truth of my life. I feel a small smile spread across my face as I begin to walk to the front door. I slowly reach out and open the door. She's standing there dressed in a simple t-shirt and pair of jeans. I step aside and let her in.

"Hello, Draco," she greets as she reaches up to kiss my cheek. I inhale her scent and become overwhelmed.

"Hermione," I say as she closes the door behind her.

She wastes no time today. She must have something more important to do with her day. Hermione wraps her arms around my neck and kisses me. I deepen the kiss as I lift her up and she wraps her legs around my waist. I head towards my bedroom.

Inside I put her down on top of my bed. I slowly remove her clothes and then she waits for me to remove mine. I climb on top of the mattress beside her and begin to kiss her neck and shoulders trailing my way down her slender form.

I travel all the way down and kiss her center before entering her. She seems to be in a hurry, but I take my time. It surprises me that she isn't urging me on. I remove all other thoughts and continue thrusting into her, slowly and deeply, until she comes underneath me.

Hermione sighs contentedly as I fall to her left; she shifts over so her head is resting on top of my chest. I wrap my arms around her to keep her close to me. I savor the feeling of her body's warmth as I hold her. Love's not something I understand or believe in anymore, but this is as close as I think I'll ever get. Yet, I'm content in these moments when I have her to myself and she takes me away from the lies, the truth, and the memories.

But all things come to an end at some point.

"You'll be fine on your own… right?" she says after sitting up and looking back at me. I simply stare at her and give her no response.

Hermione sighs again, and then moves off of the bed to redress. I lay there in the same spot and watch as she goes about the room searching for her clothes before putting them back on.

"I'll see you later, Draco," she says as she walks toward my bedroom door, before she walks out she looks over her shoulder, "Happy birthday." I stare at her still, but a small smile creeps onto my face. She returns it before walking out. I hear the other door close a few seconds later.

I exhale and close my eyes and listen to the sound of the pouring rain outside beating down onto the ground and tapping on my windows. I feel lonely again after she walks out on me. I don't care that she leaves me alone on my birthday. She always leaves me… and like I said, it's just another day.

But you'd think I'd be tired of this emptiness by now. It's always the same, miserable days with fleeting moments of happiness when she stops by. I'd being lying if I say I wanted to end this or change anything. I'm honestly satisfied, and it's not a lie I'm trying to convince myself of. The only lie is telling myself that I don't love her. I deny it, or at least try to. But I no longer believe in that, so I pretend it doesn't exist.

I try to focus on her and what I feel for her, but those thoughts leave me and are replaced by the memories that won't stop tormenting me. Why won't my past forgive me? I constantly try to put those days behind me.

The painful memories never cease. I'm coming to accept the way they persistently haunt of my mind. I know have many sins that I can never atone for… no matter how hard I try.

I open my eyes and glance out of my window. Will the rain ever stop?

Why does the rain choose me? Why does it choose someone who can't escape it?

Like my memories, it's always there. I can't hide myself from either. Simple forces of nature that I try to overcome… maybe even control. I've always been arrogant enough to try.

Soon the rain begins to sing me to sleep. I curl up underneath the covers on my bed. I'll sleep for a few hours and then wake up after the sun.

A few hours later, the sun brightens the sky behind the clouds. It's still raining lightly, I notice as I look out my window. I slowly sit up and rub my eyes before getting out of bed. I head towards the bathroom and turn on the shower. The steams fill the room while I undress. A few moments later I step inside and let the warm spray of water heat my body. It's too cold to be June.

A half hour later I leave the bathroom and head over to my closet to dress for another day. Afterward I go out of the bedroom and head for the kitchen. I'm still not used to cooking for myself, but I manage to fix something to eat.

I look at the clock after I finish. I need to get to work. So I grab my stuff and head there.

The day passes quickly and several people stop by to wish me a happy birthday. I thank them as warmly as I am able, but I really don't care. Twenty years old today, but it doesn't matter.

I suddenly realize that I should care. I shouldn't be celebrating the twenty years of the past. I should be looking at this as a new beginning. This should be a celebration of the new stage of my life. That's why I keep living day to day suffering from the misery of my memories. I shouldn't be chasing the past; I should be exploring what the future has for me.

I think about Hermione after coming to my realization. Before she came into my life, I was a hateful and cowardly person. She helped me change my life. I broke all ties with my family, gave up my inheritance, changed my beliefs… and fell in love with her.

As if I speak her up, I see her walking from her department into the main entry. I remain in my spot until she comes closer to me.

"Hello, Hermione," I say to her. She's startled, but smiles at me.

"Hello, Draco," I want to pull her against me, but I resist the urge. I've already done more than I usual do; I never speak to her in public. Outside of my flat you'd never guess that I love her or that we spend almost every night together. "How are you?"

"Fine."

"That's good," neither of us says anything else for several moments. Others pass by us and stare before continuing on their way. "Well… I have to go."

"Wait," I surprise her again.

"Yes?"

"Come join me for dinner."

She tilts her head to the side, "Now?" I nod, "Where?"

We spend about an hour at a small restaurant before we both walk back to my flat. I let her in and close the door behind us. Hermione takes off her trench coat, hangs it up, and then walks over to my sofa and haves a seat after placing her bags on the floor beside her. I stand there in my same spot in front of the door and look at her. I swallow hard while I clench my right fist. In the restaurant I had decided that I was going to start moving forward with my life. I convinced myself that I would tell her the truth. I plan to tell her I love her.

But as I stand there, feeling the sweat gather on my forehead, I can't get the words out. Before I thought blurting them out right away would be best, but now I think I should build my confidence up first. Even now I'm still just a coward who is afraid of rejection.

"What are we going to do now?" she asks, breaking me out of my nervous state. I shrug and shake my head before removing my jacket and walking over to have a seat beside her. She looks at me with an innocent smile on her face. I swallow hard again while I consider her question.

"H-Her… Hermione…" I stammer as I try to begin, but I fall silent and avert my gaze.

"Yes?" she asked calmly while placing on hand on top of mine.

Instead of finishing my thought, I cup her cheek and lean in to kiss her. She smiles briefly before returning it. I relax a little before putting my other hand around her back and lowering her down onto the sofa. We shift so that she is lying under me with her legs on either side of mine. We stay like that for several moments before I pull away; I glance down at her. I see a drop a liquid land on her left cheek and it takes me a moment to realize that it came from me. I feel more tears building up behind my eyes as I move lower to rest my head on her chest.

I close my eyes and listen to her heartbeat while she wraps her arms around me and whispers comforting words. I begin to feel the troubles from my past slip away. I want to finally forget it all and start over… and for the first time I feel like I can.

More pain is eased with every gentle stroke of her fingers along the side of my face. I smile as I realize how close my dream of peace is; I'm almost there. I'm almost there because of her. She has saved me again.

With a contented feeling in my heart, I open my eyes and look out the window; the rain is still pouring, and it's still cold. I sigh as I watch the droplets of water slide down my window.

I still don't understand the rain, but maybe it's not there to bring me more misery. Maybe I'm supposed to embrace it and let it wash everything away. Maybe it brings the cold so that I can seek out warmth… her warmth. Perhaps it's actually helping me, me who has nowhere to go or to hide.

We fall asleep there in that position on the couch.

The next morning she wakes first and kisses my forehead. The warmth of her soft lips against my skin wakes me. I smile up at her, and she does the same.

I hear the rain still pouring outside, but for once it doesn't bother me. I'm truly happy for the first time in a long while, even as I watch her gather her stuff to leave.

Together we go outside. Before she starts on her way home, I wrap my arms around her and hold her closely while I rest my head atop of hers. This warmth comforts me, and again I understand that thing called love… I can say it now. "I love you," I whisper into her ear while we stand under the umbrella she is holding. She looks up at me with a smile on her face.

"I love you, too."

_A/N: Thanks for reading. Let me know what you think (I'm very curious to know)._


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